Daniel Bryan: If You Wear My Merch I Want To Slap You In The Face

Daniel Bryan cut a promo at the Royal Rumble Axxess store, and it was incredible. He discussed the pitfalls of consumerism and tied it into his upcoming match against AJ Styles.

“I’m at the Royal Rumble store at Axxess, and I’m really excited to be here!” exclaimed Bryan before moving onto his greater point. “That my friends is what is called a lie. You see this place? Look around. I find this entire place to be despicable. This is what’s wrong with the world. You have all these people, all of whom have plenty of clothes and shirts, and yet we’re trying to entice them to buy more and more and more. They go, ‘Oh, we’re just trying to make the people happy.’ No, they just want your money.”

He then moved his target to AJ Styles. “You know who else wants your money? My opponent. You can get your XXXL AJ Styles shirt that you surely will fit into after you eat all the hot dogs that he’s been promoting on SmackDown, and you can get some gloves in all these different colors as if you need more than one set of AJ Styles gloves. Look at the plastic it’s put in, that’s good for the environment. It’s not like there are huge islands of trash in the pacific ocean!”

He then moved on to this weekend’s events. “All the people are going to storm the store and buy all this stupid merchandise. What’s even worse [about this AJ Styles vest] is that it’s made out of leather. They like to say leather as if it’s not a cow, as if it’s not from a living, sentient being that was ripped from its mother at birth and then stuffed so you could eat it and then wear it. You think that’s acceptable?”

The WWE Champion went on to throw the vests around the store. “That’s garbage. That’s making this world worse. That’s making the planet a worse place, and I’m the planet’s champion. I’m the champion for the cows!”

Bryan went on to show his disdain for his own merchandise. “They know my stance on merchandise but look at what they made,” he said while looking at a shirt of his. “Do not buy my shirts because they are bad for the planet. They know all of you idiots [will buy them]. I don’t want your money. If I see you wearing this then I want to slap you in the face! That’s what I think and yet, here they are. That’s why I have to beat AJ Styles because he’s telling people to consume, consume, consume. I’m telling you to stop.”

There’s even more in the promo so check it out below:

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